I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
My vagina is very pro this idea
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
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