It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
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