We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
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