margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
I'm at about main and main street
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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