I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
Just high enough for therapy.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
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