I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Randomize
