Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
Randomize
