we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize