i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
fuck your aforementioned shoe
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
