Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
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