Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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