I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
It's not a walk of shame if you run
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
