Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
I don't think brook has ever known best
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
Drake has all the answers
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Randomize
