So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
