if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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