I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
