I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
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