Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
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