please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
