Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
