Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
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