But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Randomize
