Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
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