I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Randomize
