i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
I'm at about main and main street
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
The best walk of shames are on the highway
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