you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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