So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
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