I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
