I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
