Whatcha textin bout Willis?
That blackeyed peas song was on, so I thought that was prediciting tonight was going to be a good night. And then my garage door opner fell and hit me in the head.
I literally just copy and pasted that from another bbm convo bc I'm far too stoned to explain that again.
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
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