I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
Randomize
