I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
