In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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