What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
