There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Randomize
