Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
Randomize
