I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
Randomize
