Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
