Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
I have peed in a lot of sinks
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
