Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
