Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
