I'm jealous of your bromance
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
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