Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(931): View more from Tennessee

so today I found out that she used to be a he....

(1-931): View more from Tennessee

are you gonna get a divorce?

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(407): View more from Florida

Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.

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(256): View more from Alabama

We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.

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(330): View more from Ohio

I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left

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(315): View more from New York

I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.

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(408): View more from California

who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am

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(703): View more from Virginia

When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.

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(208): View more from Idaho

We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts

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