They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
Sext me about skeletons
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Randomize
