16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
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