90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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