well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
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