I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
she peed on how many people?
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
I didn't notice because vodka
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize
