I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Randomize
