At least make sure they are 18
Why
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Randomize
