You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
